Taboo Subject

In writing this blog post, I do not care to hear that I am suppose to gain weight. This is just a conversation with myself that needs to be said without any encouragement or criticism. Don't worry! I am gaining weight :)

Starting January 2010, both J and I took on a healthier lifestyle which had us losing a small child by July. I had a goal to lose 30 pounds by the time I was 30. I got to 25, and then got pregnant. This was a wonderful thing because I started off my pregnancy at a healthy weight. I had muscle tone and it was a habit to exercise and eat healthy (with the occasion indulgence). I felt good about myself and was ready to rock.

I do not look at the weight when I go to the doctor, but I do weigh myself sporadically. I gained 2.3 pounds in the first trimester, which was good since the recommendation for my BMI was not to gain more than 3-5 pounds. Good, right on track. My working out declined heavily during this time for no other reason than exhaustion and fear that too much working out would hurt the baby some how.

During the second trimester, I have gained 10.3 pounds total. This is slightly unsettling. *GRANTED, I KNOW I AM SUPPOSE TO BE GAINING* I weigh myself on my wii, and it now tells me I am overweight. I worked so hard for it to tell me I am normal (BMI) and now I am back to overweight. There are days that I do not eat healthy at all during the course of the day, with the exception of breakfast. I always eat a healthy breakfast. I am a little ahead of the weight gaining recommendation. My main concern is how too much of a gain will affect my child, and secondary how I will bounce back from it.

I have gotten back to walking and some yoga/bike riding. My goal is to walk 10 miles per week, 40 miles per month. I usually walk Kobe a mile in the morning before I go to work. That will soon end as the sun won't be up until after I go to work and I am not comfortable walking alone in the dark. Lucky for me, I have people in my life willing to help me achieve my goal. Each month, as I achieve my goals, I will reward myself. If I do it this month, I will get my hair and nails done. Next time, a massage.

If we find out tomorrow that we are having a girl, my goal in life is to teach her what a healthy lifestyle is all about. Not weight or how the girls in magazines look. And part of that ongoing lesson will be her mommy showing her what it's all about.

And if we find out we are having a son, he will learn that women are more than what society thinks they should look like. Luckily, his father will be the best role model for that.